Woman says her male friend supported her after her breakup, but then ‘expected her to date him in return’ AURORATOTO GROUP

SINGAPORE: A young woman recently shared on social media that one of her guy friends somehow believed that lending her a shoulder to cry on after her breakup meant she now owed him a relationship.

Posting on the r/SGexams forum on Sunday (Sept 7), she explained that this “friend”, whom she referred to as B, initially came across as a caring listener. After hearing about her breakup, he reached out to check if she was doing okay.

“B hears about my breakup and asks if I’m ok. I’m low-key a mess, and since I feel like I can trust him, I vent to him about my ex but also mention I’m glad it’s over. This whole time, he’s been giving me an outlet to vent, and I really appreciate it,” she wrote.

The woman said that a few days later, B invited her to “grab a bite” after the Teachers’ Day celebrations. Since she only saw him as a friend, she didn’t hesitate to agree.

“It doesn’t even feel like anything special to me. It just feels like when I go out with my homegirls after school, so I didn’t really have any second thoughts. And also, I was trying not to think about dating at all.”

The woman thought their hangout had been casual and completely harmless, just two friends spending time together.

But the very next day, her assumption was completely shattered when B unexpectedly dropped a bombshell: he confessed that he had romantic feelings for her.

“He full-on confesses to me. Obviously, I was surprised as hell, and it took me a while to respond to him, and basically I was like:

Me: ‘Hi B, as you know, I recently got out of quite a bad relationship, and I just don’t know if I’m ready to date again. I’m not completely opposed to the idea, but I just don’t think it’s a good idea for now. I really need to work on my own personal issues before even thinking of dating another guy. I hope you understand.”

Unfortunately, according to the woman, B did not understand her perspective. Instead, he “crashed out” and lashed out, accusing her of “throwing him away after all he did”. He even went so far as to say she “deserved to get broken up with” if that was how she treated people.

“We haven’t talked since, and right now we basically pretend we both don’t exist. He was really nice before, too, so I don’t know what switched in him,” she wrote at the end of her post.

“You definitely dodged a bullet there.”

Her post quickly gained traction, drawing plenty of strong reactions from Singaporean Redditors.

One wrote, “What the? This is a literal TEXTBOOK EXAMPLE of nice guy syndrome.”

Another said, “Bro has had ulterior motives this whole time. Can you really consider him a true friend? He’s showing you his true colours. I feel like he is acting like the ‘nice guy’ to try to get with you, and when that didn’t work out, he got angry.”

A third Redditor echoed this sentiment, saying, “My two cents: I don’t think he was trying to help out of the ‘kindness’ of his heart; he might have been trying to get in a relationship with you the whole time. But you definitely dodged a bullet there, so good job!”

A fourth wrote, “If he truly cares about you, he can confess, of course, but he also has to accept that you have the right to reject.”

A fifth remarked, “Dang, as a guy, I feel disgusted.”

In other news, a Singaporean man shared on Reddit that he is seriously considering renting a penthouse that costs S$2,000 more per month than his current apartment, just to escape his noisy upstairs neighbour.

“Almost every night, without fail, I get jolted awake around 3 a.m. and then again at 5 a.m. — usually from stomping sounds of my upstairs neighbour,” he wrote on r/askSingapore on Tuesday (Sept 8).

“I’m a naturally very light sleeper, so even small noises wake me up. I’ve already tried everything — earplugs, white noise, ceiling thumpers, even speaking to the neighbour — but nothing helps.”

Read more: Man considers paying S$2K extra for penthouse rent just to escape noisy upstairs neighbour